Category: Ethnic Stories MATING URGE

At the Warsaw zoo, the male gorilla passed away. His mate lost all interest in life, stopped eating, sat dejectedly all day in a corner, visibly pining away for lack of love. Telexes were sent to all the zoos in the world, but the search for a replacement was to no avail. In the end a member of the management suggested advertising in the local newspapers. The following ad was published:

“Urgent. Required a mate for our female gorilla. Only candidates, who are single, strong and in perfect physical condition, need to apply. $300, twice weekly.”

Only one reply was received: The letter read:

“I am a 35 year old sailor, single and muscle-bound, ready to do the job as many times a week as necessary, but I have three conditions:

1. I don't want to have to kiss her.

2. I want nothing to do with any offspring that may result from this union.

3. I can only afford to pay $150.”

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