Category: Ethnic Stories

THERE MUST BE ORDER!

While in France a Frenchman, an Englishman and a German, who had committed a capital offense, were tried and sentenced to death. The morning of their execution came and it was the Frenchman, who was honored by going first. Before stepping up to the guillotine, he was asked by the executioner, if he wanted to be face up or down. Proudly the man replied:

“Face up. I am not afraid of the blade.”

Assisted by the executioner, he got into position and as the release rope was pulled, the oblique blade descended swiftly and ... stopped just a hairsbreadth from the victim’s extended neck. The executioner swore under his breath, reset the blade and pulled the rope once more. The blade came down with speed and again stopped just short of the Frenchman’s neck. After the same scene repeated itself for the third time, law obliged them, to set the man free.

The Englishman’s turn came up. He too was asked for the position he favors.

“Face down,” - replied the man. “I don’t want to see the bloody knife coming down on my neck.”

After he kneeled and his head was in position, the executioner activated the machine. With a shivery whoosh the heavy blade sped down and stopped a few millimeters from its goal. The machine was tried for the second time, then once again, but finally they had to let the Englishman go too.

Now only the German was left.

“Which way do you want to face?” - asked the executioner.

“It makes no difference to me,” - answered the sentenced man, - “but you should fix the damn machine first.”

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