Category: Loonies

THE EGG AND THE CHICKEN
Three variations on the same joke. Variation three:

Psychiatrist: “What is wrong with your brother?”

Sister: “He thinks he’s a chicken.”

Psychiatrist: “How long has be been acting like a chicken?”

Sister: “For three years. We would have come in sooner, but we needed the eggs.”

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Category: At School

TEACHER'S PET

The class assignment was to write an essay entitled:

“There is only one Mother!”

Moishe’le’s paper read:

“Mother sent me to get some eggs from the fridge, but I told her:

'There is only one, Mother!”

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Category: Marital Bliss

KITCHEN SEX

Sarah was in the kitchen preparing to boil eggs for breakfast. Bert walked in. Sara said:
"I want to make love to you right now."
His eyes lighted up and he thought:
"This is my lucky day."
Not wanting to lose the moment, Bert gave it his all on the kitchen table. Afterwards Sarah said: "Thanks!" - and returned to the stove.
More than a little puzzled, Bert asked:
"What was that all about?"
Sarah explained:
"The egg timer's broken."

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Category: Indians

TOTAL RECALL

An Australian travel writer touring Canada was checking out of the local Hilton and as he paid his bill asked the manager:
“By the way, what's with that Indian chief sitting in the lobby? He's been there ever since I arrived.”
“Oh that's 'Big Chief Forget-me-Not',” - said the manager. “The hotel is built on an Indian reservation and part of the agreement is to allow the chief free use of the premises for the rest of his life. He is known as 'Big Chief Forget-me-Not' because of his phenomenal memory. He is 92 and can remember the slightest detail of his life.”
The travel writer took this in and as he was waiting for his cab decided to put the chief's memory to the test.
“'ello, mate!” - said the Aussie, receiving only a slight nod in return. “What did you have for breakfast on your 21st birthday?”
“Eggs,” - was the chief's instant reply, without even looking up and indeed the Aussie was impressed. He went off on his travel writing itinerary, right across to the East Coast and back, telling others of Big Chief Forget-me-Not's great memory. One local remarked to him that 'How' was a more appropriate greeting for an Indian chief than 'ello mate'. On his return to the Hilton six months later he was surprised to see 'Big Chief Forget-me-Not' still sitting in the lobby, fully occupied with whittling away on a stick.
“How?” - said the Aussie.
“Scrambled,” - said the Chief.

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Category: Loonies

Variation three on the same joke. Can you tell who is the one who is really nuts?

THE EGG AND THE CHICKEN

Psychiatrist: “What is wrong with your brother?”

Sister: “He thinks he’s a chicken.”

Psychiatrist: “How long has be been acting like a chicken?”

Sister: “For three years. We would have come in sooner, but we needed the eggs.”

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