Category: Ethnic Stories

SALES CAMPAIGN

A petrol station owner in Dublin was trying to increase his sales. So, he put up a sign that read:

“FREE SEX WITH FILL-UP”

Soon Paddy pulled in, filled his tank and asked for his free sex. The owner told him to pick a number from 1 to 10. If he guessed correctly, he would get his free sex.

Paddy guessed 8 and the proprietor said:

“You were close. The number was 7. Sorry. No sex this time.”

A week later, Paddy, along with his friend Mick, pulled in for another fill-up. Again, he asked for his free sex. The proprietor again gave him the same story and asked him to guess the correct number.
Paddy guessed 2 this time. The proprietor said:

“Sorry, it was 3. You were close, but no free sex this time.”

As they were driving away, Mick said to Paddy:

 “I think that game is rigged and he doesn't really give away free sex.”

Paddy replied:

“No it ain't, Mick. It's not rigged at all at all. My wife won twice last week.”

 

 

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Category: Marital Bliss

STOIC PATIENT

The Millers were shown into the dentist's office, where Mr. Miller made it clear he was in a big hurry.

“No expensive extras, Doctor,” – he ordered. “No gas or needles, or any of that fancy stuff. Just pull the tooth and get it over with.”

“I wish more of my patients were as stoic as you,” – said the dentist admiringly. “Now, which tooth is it?”

Mr. Miller turned to his wife:

“Show him your tooth, Honey.”

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Category: Viagra HANDLING PAIN

A man visited the dentist. After examining him, the dentist said:

“That tooth has to come out. I’m going to give you a shot of Novocain and I’ll be back in a few minutes.”

The man grabbed the dentist’s arm and screamed:

“No way! I hate needles. I’m not getting any shot!”

The dentist said:

“OK, we’ll have to go with the gas then.”

His patient replied:

“Absolutely not! It makes me very sick for a couple of days. I’m not having gas.”

So the dentist stepped out and came back with a glass of water:

“Here,” – he said, – “take this pill.”

The man asked:

“What is it?”

The dentist replied:

“Viagra.”

The man looked surprised and asked:

“Will that kill the pain?”

“No,” – replied the dentist, – “but it will give you something to hang onto while I pull your tooth.”

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