Category: Old Age Humiliations

PERJURY

Two very elderly friends, Max and Wally, met in the park every day to feed the pigeons, watch the squirrels and discuss world problems. One day Wally didn't show up. Max didn't think much about it, figured maybe he had a cold or some such. But after Wally hadn't shown up for a week, or so, Max really got worried. However, the only time they ever got together anymore (they used to play a lot of golf together) was at the park, and Max couldn't remember where Wally lived, so he was unable to find out what had happened to him.
A month passed and Max figured old Wally had gone to his heavenly reward, but one day Max approached the park and lo and behold, there sat Wally! Max was very excited and happy to see him and told him so. Then he said:
"For crying out loud Wally, what happened to you???"
Wally replied:
"I have been in jail."
"Jail???," - cried Max. "What in the world for???"
"Well," - Wally said, - "you know Sue, that cute little blonde waitress at the coffee shop where we sometimes get coffee?"
"Yeah" - said MAX, - "I remember her. What about her?"
"Well one day last month she got mad at me and to get even, she charged me with rape. I was so proud of what everyone would think, an old geezer like me could still do, that when I got into court, I pled 'Guilty'.
The judge then took a good look at me and gave me 30 days for perjury."

Custom Search

Category: Marital Bliss

BEAUTIFUL

A man was just waking up from anesthesia after surgery and his wife was sitting by his side. His
eyes fluttered open and he said:
"You're beautiful."
Then he fell asleep again. His wife had never heard him say that before, so she stayed by his side. A few minutes later his eyes fluttered open again and he said:
"You're cute."
The wife was disappointed, because instead of "beautiful," it was now "cute."
She asked: "What happened to beautiful?"
The man replied: "The drugs are wearing off”.

Custom Search