Category: Doctors and Patients

THE NEW HOSPITAL WING

When a panel of doctors were asked to vote on adding a new wing to their hospital:

 

The Allergists voted to scratch it.

The Dermatologists advised not to make any rash moves.

 

The Gastroenterologists had sort of a gut feeling about it, but the Neurologists thought the administration had a lot of nerve.

The Obstetricians felt they were all laboring under a misconception.

 

The Ophthalmologists considered the idea shortsighted.

The Pathologists yelled, "Over my dead body", while the Pediatricians said, "Oh, Grow up!"

The Psychiatrists thought the whole idea was madness; the Radiologists could see right through it, and the Surgeons decided to wash their hands of the whole thing.

 

The Internists thought it was a bitter pill to swallow and the Plastic Surgeons said, "This puts a whole new face on the matter."

 

The Podiatrists thought it was a step forward, but the Urologists felt the scheme wouldn't hold water.

The Anesthesiologists thought the whole idea was a gas and the Cardiologists didn't have the heart to say no.

 

In the end, the Proctologists left the decision up to some asshole in administration!!!

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Category: Gay Liberation Front

INNOCENT PASSERBY

A man, with a scratched face and torn clothing, came limping into the police station. He complained that the previous evening, while taking a stroll in Central Park, two men jumped him, raped him and for good measure, beat him up too. The police sergeant looked him over curiously and asked:

“But you are a strong, young man. Why didn’t run away?”

“Have you ever tried running in high-heels?”

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Category: At Work

GOVERNMENT EMPLOYEES

A guy went to the U. S. Post Office to apply for a job. The interviewer asked him:
"Have you been in the service?"
"Yes," - he said. "I was in Viet Nam for three years."
The interviewer said:
"That will give you extra points toward employment".
Then he asked:
"Are you disabled in any way?"
The guy said:
"Yes 100%... a mortar round exploded near me and blew my testicles off."
The interviewer told the guy:
"O. K. I can hire you right now. The hours are from 8:00 A. M. to 4:00 P. M. You can start tomorrow. Come in at 9:00 A. M.
The guy was puzzled and said:
"If the hours are from 8:00 A. M. to 4:00 P. M. then why do you want me to come in at 9:00 A. M?"
"This is a government job," - the interviewer replied. "For the first hour we just sit around scratching our balls....... no point in you coming in for that.”

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