Category: In the Middle East

NOMEN EST OMEN (The European version)

Five Germans in an Audi Quattro arrived at the Italian border. The Italian Customs agent stopped them and told them:

"It's a illegala to putta 5 people in a Quattro."

"Vot do you mean it'z illegal?" - asked the German driver.

"Quattro meansa four" - replied the Italian official.

"Qvattro is just ze name of ze automobile", - the Germans retort unbelievingly. "Look at ze papers: zis car is designt to kerry 5 persons."

"You can'ta pulla thata one on me!", - replied the Italian customs agent. "Quattro meansa four. You hava fivea peopleina your car and you are thereforea breaking the law".

The German driver replied angrily:

"You idiot! Call your supervisor over, I vant to speak to somevone viz more intelligence!"

"Sorry", - responded the Italian official, - "he can'ta come. He'sa busy witha 2 guys in a Fiat Uno.

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Category: In the Middle East

NOMEN EST OMEN (The Middle East version)

For the inhabitants of a small, constricted country, the call of the open spaces has a special charm. Five Israelis decided to make a trip to the Sinai Desert. They all piled into a Renault car and drove south until they reached the Egyptian Border. They presented their passports, with visas duly stamped and expected to be waved on. Instead, the border guard bent down to the car window and in a stern voice said:

“One of you will have to get out!”

“But why?” - wondered the tourists.

“There are five of you in a Renault 4, that’s one too many.”

The Israelis could not manage to convince the guard that the name of the car has no connection to the number passengers permitted to ride in it. Even the insurance policy, which stated “carries five passengers”, did not make him change his mind. In the end the Israelis asked:

“May we speak with your superior officer?”

“You may not. He is having an argument with a couple who arrived in a Fiat Uno.”

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Category: Old Age Humiliations TEMPERATE ZONE

After WWI, the border between the newly independent Polish state and Russia was being delineated. One day the demarcation committee reached a hut, that the borderline was about to go right through the middle of. In the hut lived an elderly couple and a member of the committee thought that it would be kind if they would ask them which country they want to belong to.

“If it is all the same to you, we would prefer to live in Poland,” - answered the old man.

“And why if we may ask?”

“We are old and feeble and the severe colds of those Russian winters would be hard for us to bear.”

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