Category: Modern Fables

ANYTHING FOR A LITTLE PEACE

Little Red Riding Hood was walking through the forest, when suddenly she saw the big, bad wolf, hiding behind the trees.

“Wolf, wolf,” - she asked, - “why are your eyes so big?”

“Leave me in peace,” - shouted the wolf - “can’t you see that I'm trying to have a shit.”

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Category: Drinking Problem

BOOZER'S LOGIC

 A drunk walked into a pub and said to the bartender:

“Buy everyone in the house a drink and pour yourself one.”
The bartender did just that and handed the man a bill for $39.00. The drunk said:
“Sorry, but I haven't got it.”
The bartender slapped the guy around a few times then threw him out into the street. The very next day the same drunk walked into the pub and once again said:
“Buy everyone in the house a drink and pour one for yourself.”
The bartender figured to himself that the man can't possibly be stupid enough to pull the same trick twice, so he poured a round of drinks for the house, had a drink himself and handed the drunk a bill for $37.00. The drunk said:
“I haven't got it.”
The bartender picked the guy up, gave him the hiding of his life and threw him out into the street. The next day the same drunk came back into the same pub and said:
“Buy everyone in the house a drink.”
In disgust the bartender said:
“What, no drink for me this time?”
The drunk replied:
“No, you get violent when you drink.”

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