Category: Ecumenical Stories

MARTIAN STORY

Two astronauts landed on Mars.  Their mission: to check whether there is oxygen on the planet.

"Give me the box of matches" - said one. "Either it burns and there is oxygen, or nothing happens."

He took the box and was ready to strike a match when out of the blue a Martian appeared waving all his arms:

 "No, no, don't!" 

The two guys looked at each other, worried. Could there be an unknown explosive gas on Mars? Still, the first one took up again the match. Now a crowd of hysterical Martians came, all waving their arms:

"No, no, don't do that!" 

"It looks serious. What are they afraid of? But we're here for Science, to know if man can breathe on Mars".

He stroke the match, which flamed up, burned down, and..... nothing happened.

"Why did you want to prevent us from striking a match?"

The leader of the Martians said:

"It is Shabbos today!"

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Category: Doctors and Patients

LAST WORDS

An elderly man became very ill and a priest was called out to administer the last sacrament. All the family assembled around the bed, but before the priest could utter a word, the sick man suddenly started to rattle and using sign language asked to be given some paper and a writing utensil. The priest gave him a block of paper and a pen, the man with great effort scribbled something on it and visibly suffering, expired. Reverently, the priest put the paper into an envelope and sealed it. At the funeral, after a touching eulogy praising the virtues of the deceased, the priest said:
“Dear mourners! During his last moments our brother wrote down a few lines, which I would like to read to you now.”
He opened the envelope and started reading:
“Father! You are standing on my oxygen bottle hose!”

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Category: Doctors and Patients LAST WORDS

An elderly man became very ill and a priest was called out to administer the last sacrament. All the family assembled around the bed, but before the priest could utter a word, the sick man suddenly started to rattle and using sign language asked to be given some paper and a writing utensil. The priest gave him a block of paper and a pen, the man with great effort scribbled something on it and visibly suffering, expired. Reverently, the priest put the paper into an envelope and sealed it. At the funeral, after a touching eulogy praising the virtues of the deceased, the priest said:

“Dear mourners! During his last moments our brother wrote down a few lines, which I would like to read to you now.”

He opened the envelope and started reading:

“Father! You are standing on my oxygen bottle hose!”

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