Category: Marital Bliss 

REAL ASSET

Two Swedes from Wisconsin are sittin' in a boat on Dead Lake, fishing and suckin' down beer, when all of a sudden Sven said:

"I think I'm going to divorce my wife. She hasn't spoken to me in over six months."

Ole sipped his beer and said:

"You better think it over. Women like that are hard to find."

   

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Category: In the Middle East

NOT TO WORRY

The new era of technical progress had finally dawned at the Israeli border settlement. It was hoped that with the purchase of the very last word in milking equipment, many man-hours would be saved and the supply of milk would increase. Eli, in charge of the cow stables, received the shipment and as he was unpacking it, he had a sudden idea:

“Perhaps it would be best, if I first tried out the machine on myself.”

As advertised, the milking machine was user-friendly, easy to set up and as soon as it was attached, it started sucking and massaging gently. After a while, when he achieved satisfaction with the product, Eli reached out and attempted to switch it off. To his great surprise, he could find no “ON/OFF” switch. The constant sucking started becoming uncomfortable and even painful. With great effort, he dragged himself over with all the attachments to the phone and dialed the importer’s number. The technical representative’s answer was really comforting:

“Don’t worry, sir! Our machine is completely automatic and is guaranteed to shut itself off after 3 liters.”

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