Category: Male Chauvinists

NATURAL PHENOMENON

The well-endowed youth was very proud of his prodigious equipment. One sultry summer day early morning, he passed by a lake and felt very much like taking a swim. He did not have a bathing suit, but since no one was around, he quickly undressed and went skinny-dipping. The water was so cool and refreshing that he forgot himself and when he came out of the lake, other people were already on the shore.

A passerby stopped, stared in wonder and then started sniggering at the slowly emerging youth’s male organ, which seemed to be of infinite length. Only when the water reached the bather’s knees, came its tip finally into sight. The man reacted angrily at the ridicule of the onlookers:

“You ignoramuses, don’t you know it shrinks in cold water?”          

   

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Category: Naughty Jokes

STATISTICS

A man boarded an airplane and took his seat. As he settled in, he glanced up and saw the most beautiful woman boarding the plane. He soon realized she was heading straight towards his seat. As fate would have it, she took the seat right beside his. Eager to strike up a conversation he blurted out:

"Business trip or pleasure?"

She turned, smiled and said:

"Business, I'm going to the Annual Nymphomaniacs of America Convention in Chicago." He swallowed hard. Here was the most gorgeous woman he had ever seen sitting next to him, and she was going to a meeting of Nymphomaniacs. Struggling to maintain his composure, he calmly asked:

"What's your business role at this convention?"

"Lecturer," - she responded. "I use information that I have learned from my personal experiences to debunk some of the popular myths about sexuality."

"Really?" - he said. "And what kind of myths are there?"

"Well," - she explained, - "one popular myth is that African-American men are the most well-endowed of all men, when in fact it is the Native American Indian who is most likely to possess that trait. Another popular myth is that Frenchmen are the best lovers when actually it is men of Jewish descent who are the best. I have also discovered that the lover with absolutely the best stamina is the Southern Redneck."

Suddenly the woman became a little uncomfortable and blushed:

"I'm sorry," - she said, - "I shouldn't really be discussing all of this with you. I don't even know your name."

"Tonto," - the man said, - "Tonto Goldstein, but my friends call me Bubba."

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Category: Naughty Jokes

A FRUGAL TYPE

A brawny guy stood at an electronic appliance store’s window and wistfully looked at the merchandise. It was a slow day, there were no customers in sight and the storekeeper decided to liven up things a little.

“Hey you!” - he called out. “What is it that you fancy?”

“It is my wife’s birthday,” - answered the man. “I would very much like to surprise her with a new iron, but as it is, I am flat broke.”

The shopkeeper had an idea:

“I heard that you athletic types, are well-endowed in the lower parts of your body. Is it true?”

“I cannot complain,” - replied the destitute fellow.

“Then, I have a proposition for you. You see that iron there in the window? Should you manage to carry it, unaided by your hands, just on your penis, from one end of the shop to the other, it will be yours to take home to your wife.”

To the merchant’s surprise, the man performed the prescribed task easily and in a few minutes triumphantly carried the iron home. His wife was very happy with her present, but at night in bed, when she tried to show her gratitude, her husband drew away and complained of fatigue. The same scene repeated itself the next night and the night after, until one day the man found his wife crying bitterly.

“What happened, my dear?” - he inquired anxiously.

“You don’t love me anymore,” - she sniveled. - “You no longer come to me at night.”

“You don’t understand, darling. I love you dearly, but you see, I have decided to get us a refrigerator next.”

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