Category: Marital Bliss

SEX IN THE DARK

Every time they made love the husband always insisted on shutting off the lights.

Well, after 20 years the wife felt this was ridiculous. She figured she would break him out of this crazy habit. So one night, while they were in the middle of a wild, screaming, romantic session, she turned on the lights...

She looked down and saw her husband was holding a battery-operated pleasure device.

A v*i*b*r*a*t*o*r!

Soft, wonderful and larger than a real one.

She went completely ballistic.

"You impotent b*a*s*t*a*r*d," - she screamed at him, - "how could you be lying to me all of these years? You better explain yourself!"

The husband looked her straight in the eyes and said calmly:  

"I'll explain the toy... you explain the kids".

   

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Category: Misers A GOOD BARGAIN

Mr. Miser died and his wife wanted to publish an obituary in the local paper.

“What shall I write in the obituary?” – asked the adman.

“Just ‘Bill is dead’,” – replied Mrs. Miser. “After all everybody knew him.”

“But Madam, six words will cost you the same amount as three words.”

“Then write ‘Bill is dead, Toyota for sale’”

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