Category: At Work

SICK LEAVE

A woman called her boss one morning and told him that she is staying home because she is not feeling well.

"What's the matter?" - he asked.

"I have a case of anal glaucoma," - she said in a weak voice.

"What the hell is anal glaucoma?"

"I can't see my ass coming into work today.”

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Category: Mothers

OUT OF HER KIND HEART

Said a mother to her neighbor:

“I don’t know why it is said that people in the big city are so bad. My daughter moved to New York just a few months ago and her boss has already presented her with a fur coat, a sports car and a fully furnished apartment.”

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Category: At Work

COMMUNICATION BARRIER

A visitor at the office heard the boss bellowing in the next room.

“Why is he shouting?” – he asked the secretary.

“He is talking to London.”

“Then why doesn’t he use the phone?”

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Category: Salesmen

MAN'S BEST FRIEND

Said the salesman to his boss:

“I’m happy to report that I managed to sell that expensive suit we had in stock for ages..”

“You don’t say! That blue-pink double-breasted hideous outfit?

“Yeah, that’s the one.”  

“Well done. I was afraid that we’d be stuck forever with that monstrosity. But what happened to your hand?”

“The customer seemed quite happy, but his seeing-eye dog almost killed me.”

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Category: At Work GOOD REFLEXES

“Canadians, Canadians, come on!” – declared one of the employees. “All the population is made up of hookers and hockey players.”

Said the boss:

“My wife is from Canada.”

“Really?” – said the employee. “And which team is she on?”

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Category: At Work

JUST KIDDING

An office worker entered his boss’s office without knocking. He stuck out his tongue, overturned the superior’s cup of coffee, emptied the wastebasket onto his head, when his colleagues came up running and stopped him:

“Albert, we were just kidding. You didn’t win the first price on the lottery.”

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Category: At Work COMMUNICATION BARRIER A visitor at the office heard the boss bellowing in the next room. “Why is he shouting?” – he asked the secretary. “He is talking to London.” “Then why doesn’t he use the phone?”

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