A plane hit a patch of severe turbulence and the passengers were holding on tight as it rocked and reeled through the night. A little old lady turned to a minister who was sitting behind her and said:"You're a man of God. Can't you do something about this?"He replied:"Sorry, I can't. I'm in sales, not management."
JEWISH DOG
A Jew named Hirsch lived alone in the outskirts of the small town with a pet dog he doted on. The dog finally died and Hirsch went to the rabbi and asked:
“Rabbi, my darling dog, who for the last 15 years has been my only companion and who was such a comfort to me in my loneliness, has passed away. Could I bury be him in the Hirsch family plot in cemetery?”
The rabbi replied:
“No, we cannot bury the creature in our cemetery, but I know the minister of the church down the road, maybe he'll able to do something for the animal.”
Hirsch said:
“I'll go there right now. Do you think a donation $50,000 would reward him for his help?”
The rabbi asked:
“Why didn't you tell me the dog was Jewish?”
A priest and a minister walked into a bar. After sitting down, ordering and some chitchat the priest said:
“Have you noticed that there are no women in this bar?”
Then he realized the truth:
“I think we're in a gay bar.”
Just then, a man approached them and tried to flirt with the priest. The priest was dumbfounded and didn't know what to do. The minister leaned over and whispered something in the man's ear. The man nodded and walked off. The relieved priest said:
“Thanks. What did you tell him?”
The minister replied:
“I just told him we're on our honeymoon.”
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