Category: Airlines

CUSTOMER RELATIONS

The passengers on the transatlantic flight had just finished their meal and were comfortably relaxed, when the loudspeakers suddenly came on:

“This is the captain speaking. I would like to advise you that we have just lost our starboard engine. However, please remain calm. We have everything under control. This aircraft can operate with three engines just as well.”

About fifteen minutes later a movie was shown in the cabin and the passengers almost forgot the previous announcement, when the captain’s voice was heard again:

“I am sorry, but we seem to have lost another engine. You have no cause to worry. The aircraft is capable of flying with two engines. However, purely as a precautionary measure, those passengers who can swim, should concentrate on the left side of the cabin and those who cannot, should move to the right side.”                

Another fifteen minutes passed and the now familiar voice was heard again on the public address system:

“This is the captain once again. We have just lost our third engine and are initiating ditching procedures. All passengers are requested to don their life vests. As soon as the aircraft comes to a complete stop, the crew will open the exit doors. Please remove your shoes and follow the instructions of your crew in using the emergency escape slides. Those on the left side of the plane can commence swimming towards the shore. Those on the right side will remain floating and it is hoped, will eventually be located and rescued. In any case, should we not meet again, I want to thank you for flying with our airline.”   

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