Category: C'est la Vie

BRIEF ONES

¬ Jesus loves you... everyone else thinks you are an asshole.

¬ God must love stupid people, he made so many.

¬ If we aren't supposed to eat animals, why are they made of meat?

¬ I know what you're thinking and you should be ashamed of yourself.

¬ We are born naked, wet and hungry. Then things get worse.

¬ Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.

¬ Be nice to your kids. They'll choose your nursing home.

¬ Diplomacy is the art of saying 'Nice doggie!'... till you can find a rock.

¬ Sex on television can't hurt you unless you fall off.

¬ A pessimist is an experienced optimist.

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