Category: From the Mouths of Babes

MORTGAGE

For his birthday, little Patrick asked for a 10-speed bicycle. His father said:

"Son, we'd buy you one, but the mortgage on this house is $280,000 and your mother just lost her job. There's no way we can afford it."

The next day the father saw little Patrick heading out the front door with a suitcase. So he asked:

"Son, where are you going?"

Little Patrick told him:

"I was walking past your room last night and heard you telling Mom you were pulling out. Then I heard her tell you to wait because she was coming too. And I'll be damned if I'm staying here by myself with a $280,000 mortgage and no bike!"

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Category: Male Chauvinists

SOMETHING GOOD

After twenty years of married life, the husband was quite indifferent to the pleasures of marital life. Though he dutifully executed his conjugal obligations once in a week, he never showed great enthusiasm. Not with his wife, anyway. So when one night she felt her spouse move around during the act, she was pleasantly surprised and exclaimed:

“So there is something good in me, after all.” 

“There is,” – answered the husband morosely, – “but I am going to pull it out soon.”

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