Category: Ethnic Stories

RESPECTFUL GUYS

After almost 60 years of happy marriage, Weiss's wife has passed away and the old man found it difficult to manage on his own. His son's wife was - to say it mildly - not enthusiastic at the idea of her father-of-law moving in with them, so Weiss junior, after a lot of soul searching, convinced his father to move into an old folks' home. As at the only Jewish institution in their town there were absolutely no vacancies, the son decided to put his father into a Christian home. Actually it was a very exclusive establishment, located on top of a hill, surrounded by a spacious park and luxuriously appointed.

The old man adjusted to his surroundings in a relatively short period and seemed to be enjoying the place's multiple facilities. After a few weeks, some friends paid him a visit and asked him how he is getting along in his new home.
“They are quite respectful at this place,” - said old Weiss - “look at that chap with a polo cap over there, for example. He won many a golf tournament in his time and even though he has not touched a club in fifteen years, they still call him 'Champ'. And that guy at the pool, he has worked for forty years as an airline pilot. On account of his shaking hands, he has not been near an airplane in more than ten years, but everybody still addresses him as 'Captain'.”
“And what about you?” - asked the friends.
“Me? I have not touched a woman in five years, but they still call me 'Fucking Jew'.”

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