Category: Animal World

BRAGGARTS

Three mice were sitting in a bar in a pretty rough neighborhood late at night, trying to impress each other about how tough they are. The first mouse pounded a shot of scotch, slammed the glass onto the bar, turned to the second mouse and said:

“When I see a mousetrap, I lie on my back and set it off with my foot. When the bar comes down, I catch it in my teeth, bench press it twenty times to work up an appetite and then make off with the cheese.”

The second mouse ordered up two shots of sour mash, pounded them both, slammed each glass onto the bar, turned to the first mouse and replied:

“Yeah, well when I see rat poison, I collect as much as I can, take it home, grind it up into a powder and add it to my coffee each morning so I can get a good buzz going for the rest of the day.”

The first mouse and the second mouse then turned to the third mouse. The third mouse let out a long sigh and said to the first two:

“I don’t have time for this bullshit. I gotta go home and fuck the cat.”

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