Showing posts with label nude. Show all posts
Showing posts with label nude. Show all posts

Sunday, October 02, 2011

Category: Marital Bliss

MARATHON

A woman was having a daytime affair while her husband was at work. One wet and lusty day she was in bed with her boyfriend when, to her horror, she heard her husband's car pull into the driveway.
"Oh my God - hurry! Grab your clothes and jump out the window. My husband's home early!"
"I can't jump out the window. It's raining out there!"
"If my husband catches us in here, he'll kill us both!" - she replied. “He's got a hot temper and a gun, so the rain is the least of your problems!"
So the boyfriend scooted out of bed, grabbed his clothes and jumped out the window. As he ran down the street in the pouring rain, he quickly discovered he had run right into the middle of the town's annual marathon, so he started running along beside the others, about 300 of them. Being naked, with his clothes tucked under his arm, he tried to blend in as best he could. After a little while a small group of runners who had been watching him with some curiosity, jogged closer.
"Do you always run in the nude?" - one asked.
"Oh yes!" - he replied, gasping in air. "It feels so wonderfully free!"
Another runner moved alongside.
"Do you always run carrying your clothes with you under your arm?"
“Oh, yes" - our friend answered breathlessly. "That way I can get dressed right at the end of the run and get in my car to go home!
Then a third runner cast his eyes a little lower and queried:
"Do you always wear a condom when you run? "

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Thursday, July 28, 2011

Category: Ecumenical Stories

ORDINATION
Twelve priests were about to be ordained. The final test was for them to line up in a straight row, totally nude, in a garden while a sexy and beautiful, big breasted, nude model danced before them. Each priest had a small bell attached to his penis and they were told that anyone whose bell rang when she danced in front of them would not be ordained because he had not reached a state of spiritual purity.

The beautiful model danced before the first candidate, with no reaction. She proceeded down the line with the same response from all the priests until she got to the final priest, Carlos. As she danced, his bell began to ring so loudly that it flew off and fell clattering to the ground. Embarrassed, Carlos took a few steps forward and bent over to pick it up.
Then all the other bells started to ring ....

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