Category: Parenting

TRY AGAIN

A twenty-one-year-old girl told her Mom that she has missed her period for two months. Very worried, the mother went to the drugstore and bought a test kit. The test result showed that the girl is pregnant. Shouting, cursing, crying, the mother said:

"Who was the pig that did this to you? I want to know!"

The girl picked up the phone and made a call.  

Half an hour later a Ferrari stopped in front of their house; a mature and distinguished man with gray hair, impeccably dressed in a very expensive suit, stepped out of the car and entered the house. He sat in the living room with the father, the mother and the girl and told them:

"Good morning, your daughter has informed me of the problem. I can't marry her because of my personal family situation, but I'll provide support. If a girl is born, I will bequeath her two retail stores, a townhouse, a beach villa and a $1,000,000 bank account. If a boy is born, my legacy will be a couple of factories and a $2,000,000 bank account. If it is twins, a factory and $1,000,000 each. However, if there is a miscarriage, what do you suggest I do?"  

At this point, the father, who had remained silent, placed a hand firmly on the man's shoulder and told him:

"Then you try again."

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Category: Computers IF A RESTAURANT FUNCTIONED LIKE MICROSOFT Patron: “Waiter!” Waiter: “Hi, my name is Bill and I'm your Support Waiter. What seems to be the problem?” Patron: “There's a fly in my soup!” Waiter: “Try again, maybe the fly won't be there this time.” Patron: “No, it's still there.” Waiter: “Maybe it's the way you're using the soup. Try eating it with a fork.” Patron: “Even when I use the fork, the fly is still there.” Waiter: “Maybe the soup is incompatible with the bowl. What kind of bowl are you using?” Patron: “A SOUP bowl!” Waiter: “Hmmm, that should work. Maybe it's a configuration problem. How was the bowl set up?” Patron: “You brought it to me on a saucer. What has that to do with the fly in my soup?!” Waiter: “Can you remember everything you did before you noticed the fly in your soup?” Patron: “I sat down and ordered the Soup of the Day!” Waiter: “Have you considered upgrading to the latest Soup of the Day?” Patron: “You have more than one Soup of the Day each day??” Waiter: “Yes, the Soup of the Day is changed every hour.” Patron: “Well, what is the Soup of the Day now?” Waiter: “The current Soup of the Day is tomato.” Patron: “Fine. Bring me the tomato soup and the check. I'm running late now.” The waiter left and returned with another bowl of soup and the check: Waiter: “Here you are, Sir, the soup and your check.” Patron: “But this is potato soup.” Waiter: “Yes, the tomato soup wasn't ready yet.” Patron: “Well, I'm so hungry now, I'll eat anything.” The waiter left. Patron: “Waiter! There's a gnat in my soup!” The check: Soup of the Day ……… .........……… $5.00 Upgrade to newer Soup of the Day…. $2.50 Access to support …………………… $10.00 Total ………………………………… $17.50

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