Category: Computers

PASSWORD

A wife was helping her husband set up his computer and at the appropriate point in the process, told him that he would now need to enter a password. Something he will use to log on.
The husband was in a rather amorous mood and figured he would try for the shock effect to bring this to his wife's attention. So, when the computer asked him to enter his password, he made it plainly obvious to his wife that he was keying in...

P.....

E.....

N.....

I.....

S.....

His wife fell off her chair laughing when the computer replied:
PASSWORD DENIED - NOT LONG ENOUGH

"xx" - said
"xx" - said

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Category: Computers

PERFECT TRANSLATION

After many years of experimentation, the Army announced that it had managed to develop a computer program to translate any English text into Russian. The commanding general, who came to see the new product, was invited to choose a sentence for translation. The general thought for a minute and then uttered:
“Out of sight, out of mind!”
Within 5 seconds, a Russian sentence appeared on the screen. Everybody stared at the Cyrillic script, but as none of those present understood Russian, nobody could verify that the translation was correct. Suddenly the general had a bright idea (it does happen sometimes, believe me!):
“Let the computer translate the Russian sentence back to English.”
Again 5 seconds passed and then the translation came up. It read:
“Invisible idiot!”

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Category: Computers

HAROLD, THE COMPUTER GUY

I was having trouble with my computer, so I called Harold, the computer guy, to come over.

Harold clicked a couple of buttons and solved the problem. He gave me a bill for a minimum service call. As he was walking away, I called after him:
"So, what was wrong?"
He replied:
"It was an ID ten T error."
I didn't want to appear stupid, but nonetheless inquired:
"An ID ten T Error? What's that, in case I need to fix it again?"
Harold grinned:
"Haven't you ever heard of an ID ten T error before?"
"No"- I replied.
"Write it down" - he said - "and I think you'll figure it out."
So I wrote it down:
"I D 1 0 T."
Shame, I used to like Harold .................

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